Premieres and Piddle Stains

Here's a handy dandy schedule of this season's premiere dates.

The following dates each will make me piddle myself in varying degrees:

Tomorrow: My beloved Gilmore Girls come a callin' (also House and Supernatural premiere).

Friday, September 16: Threshold (giving it a shot)

Monday, September 19: The Bluths! The Bluths! The Bluths! Arrested Development begins another season of dysfunction.

Tuesday, September 20: My Name is Earl, followed by perhaps the most piddle-worthy premiere of the season (though Alias and Lost certainly give it a run for the money) in Nip/Tuck

Wednesday, September 21: Guilty pleasure alert . . . America's Next Top Model dukes it out with Martha's version of The Apprentice, followed by those airline disaster survivors on Lost.

Thursday, September 22: Everybody Hates Chris (which will, after next week, be taped to make room for Alias). P.S., I'm so over The Donald. Sorry, won't be watching him this season.

Sunday, September 25: This night will take an extra big dose of Shout to clean my piddle-soaked tighty-whiteys, with Desperate Housewives, Curb Your Enthusiasm, and Ricky Gervais's new show Extras all premiering.

Wednesday, September 28: Oh, Miss Mars, you spunky little PI . . . Veronica Mars gears up for a promising sophomore season.

Thursday, September 29: Alias is the shiznit. 'Nuff said.

This list has worked me into a bit of a fanboy frenzy.

Excuse me while I roll over for a smoke . . . .